No, it is not what you think…This is the “easiest” book I read this year… I am still missing, from my list, to read a gift (I started to read it but it did not caught me, so I still do not know if I should carry on reading it or just donate it), I also missed romance (october) maybe because I was busy trying to find it for myself in real life jaja can anybody find me somebody to love? I also missed to read one I´ve left unfinished, so I guess it will still be unfinished until next year (november) but two weeks ago I saw this book on my mom´s kitchen… it was not opened yet and it caught my attention… i asked her if it was going to be a Christmas gift and she told me that it was a belated birthday gift given to her. I begged her to give it to me, she lend it. I read it in one week.
Tbh I was hoping this book to change me and really help me to grow, but it was just reassurance of things I already do, so I guess I am in the right path. I will try to be as brief as possible because I truly want you to read it (promise it is a good reading, you will feel related, you will feel more free and you will laugh at parts)…
*Muscular Test: this is a test that someone did to me about three months ago when I was about to enter to the depression path… with this test I find out that when you focus on the right or bright things in life, you are strong. Have you ever seen Harry Potter? Do you know what DEMENTORS are? If you do, I will explain it better with this… depression is a DEMENTOR´S kiss, it will bring out the worse in you and worse thing will keep happening if you don´t practice your EXPECTO PATRONUM and, even when down, focus on the happy things or happy moments you have lived. Remember that being sad is a good thing, being sick is a good thing… why? well because that help us appreciate more life, good moments, good people and our laugh when it happens. So, just fuck it! fuck feeling down! It´s okay to feel like that (as long as you do not become attach to it).
After that, he mentions another “healer” author that I’ve always felt I should read … Louise Hay in his book “you can heal your life”. And this tip is to tell you 100 times a day “I love and approve myself.” Obviously there will be resistance in the beginning … nor will you believe the words you say, but little by little the light of those words will be extended until the darkest corners of your soul and head are illuminated, until they spread to the external world and can illuminate the world. So you know, if you’re not Harry Potter or Hermione Granger … you just have to repeat the muggle term “I love and approve myself” instead of our well-known “expect patronum” …
*Level 1 of “f**k it”: feeling in peace. Whenever someone says “feeling in peace” I picture myself in lake Como, waking up, writing or having a meditation session with a lovely view or a lavender room… Maybe you imagine or picture something different, and that´s okay. But, from my point of view and what I understand from the book, “feeling in peace” is feeling good or feeling okay with what you already have. It´s never too late, don’t try to go so fast or grow so fast… don´t listen to those who say “grow up” or “you are running out of time”. Keep playing, keep dreaming, keep dancing and be okay with TODAY. One day at the time. But still, don´t be lazy! (this last part is my advice to you… have dreams but turn them to plans) but don´t listen to me, fuck it! just be okay with your own timing and even with your own “lazyness”.
Another advice (that you can also say “f**k it!” to it and feel okay with not doing it) is to not put your peace in hands of others, even the closest and the ones you love the most. That´s not practical because you truly not know when you can rely on them, you shouldn´t, period.
Do not set a “I will feel at peace when…” and after that a never-ending list… finish my career, finish my master, landing my dream job, buy my vespa, buy my car, marry the person of my dreams, have lovely children, etc. Because in the end, that “peace” you will reach (that, to me, is more satisfaction) will only endure for few seconds, hours or weeks… after that it´ll be gone, because you´ll be used to those things, persons or life… Do not set your pace in that wish list…
“The issue is that those who are after the award or recognition do not feel at peace, until they achieve it. In fact, many consider that << not feeling at peace >> is something positive, because behind it there are more motivations: << encouragement >>, << determination >>, << ambition >>, but it is the same . We have convinced ourselves that a certain amount of concern is essential for common progress.”
A thermostat to know if we are or not in “peace” are animals. An example (with which I can feel identified with, now that I have adopted one) are cats … when we are relaxed is when they approach … and being with them, we relax even more … same thing happens with peace … once We feel it, if we become aware of it, we can reach it again more easily and feel more and more at peace with our lives or moments.
“As soon as you can do it in practice, enjoy feeling superior to stressed people who are not in search of peace. It is something that will happen sooner rather than later, that is, better do it now. But really enjoy it. It’s like seeing other fat people when you are on a diet. They may not weigh more than you, but unlike you, they are not on the path lit to thinness. Savages.”
* Level 2: I can feel at peace now …
The first step of this level is to be grateful for everything you have or that surround you this very moment. It’s that simple.
The second step is to sit and have tea (without doing anything, just you watching people go by, thinking or thinking) … it is a more pleasant way to “meditate” until you are at peace and enjoy yourself and your thoughts.
“What happens to you? How do you feel relaxation and peace for you? What happens inside your body and mind? As you begin to observe this, make a mental note (in a relaxed way) for later. Because what you experience when you feel at peace can be used later to make you feel more at peace when you are not. That is the fundamental trick of relaxation exercises: use the <<effects>> of relaxation to generate it whenever you want and / or need to relax. ”
* Level 3: f**k it!, feel at peace with life exactly as it is …
An essential element of the power of “f**k it” is to say it. When we say something that really interests us or worries us but causes us pain, it really doesn’t matter or shouldn’t matter so much. By saying “f**k it” we get rid of what hurts us, we reduce our interest in it in a conscious and literal way … we let it go (yes, like the frozen song!)
Another important thing that we must understand at this time that everyone talks about positivism is that sometimes we should allow ourselves an hour, a day or several days of negativity and say “fuck it” I am negative, and I’m fine with it today! Let’s be genuine and congruent!
Mention is made of something that seems very interesting to me from the book “Loving what is” by Byron Katie … to be at peace one of the best things we can do is divide life into “my affairs”, “your affairs” and “The affairs of God.” So we take care of our own affairs, we solve what we want and we can solve and the rest, well… “fuck it!” This was already told to me by a friend in high school… but I had never seen it with a clearer perspective divided into three… she once asked me “what is it that bothers you baby?” obviously it was something of a boy and she asked me “and can you do something about it” my obvious answer was “nop” so she said “then let it go” …(yes, so very FROZEN). Another thing I´ve been told is “leave it to God” or “put it in god´s hands” and my God, they are right … so the rule of three and to be at peace with their lives as they are!
“If you could love yourself the way you love your children (if you have one), you would feel more at peace with yourself instantly. If you could love life, and everything that happens in front of your window towards reality, you will instantly feel more at peace with life. ”
And finally it leaves us with 2 phrases that reach my heart, for which I want to repeat here:
“Everything will be fine and everything will be fine, and all kinds of things will be fine” – Juliana de Norwich
“Success is the ability to go from failure to failure, without losing enthusiasm”